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(More customer reviews)This is one of the funniest MST3K episodes of all time. I hardly even know where to begin on this one. Here's the background: a teacher is so disgusted with bad guys selling drugs to kids that she decides to blow up the drug lab outside of town (where she seems to think all of the world's drugs are centrally processed). She recruits a supposedly famous singer best known for shining, shining, shining, shining, shining her love, then shining it some more; a stunt woman; a cop; a model; and a female martial arts expert to help her carry out the job. It's a whole lot like Charlie's Angels, only these angels are much less attractive and more annoying.
The most amazing thing about Angels Revenge is the cast. Never have so many familiar names humiliated themselves so thoroughly in the same film. First we have Arthur Godfrey playing himself; watching him engage in excited antics at a Vegas concert is pretty pitiful, really. Then we have Alan Hale (aka Skipper) who plays--once she finally stops shining her love--our singer's manager; the Skipper has just one little scene and luckily escapes without too much damage. The same cannot be said for his fellow castaway Jim Backus. Backus plays the incompetent leader of a ragtag band of right-wing revolutionaries calling themselves the American Right; his performance is truly painful to watch--really; I'm not just saying it for effect. Then we have Pat Buttram, Mr. Haney from Green Acres, selling used cars--his scene can be watched without too much discomfort. Another notable player is Peter Lawford; I didn't like the guy in his prime, and I certainly don't like to see him going around without a shirt on in his later years. Lawford apparently survived this acting ordeal by staying completely drunk throughout shooting, slurring his lines rather obviously. Rounding out the list of notable actors is Jack Palance, who plays the middleman in between the pushers on the streets and Mr. Big; he's actually not half bad, but the movie is so awful it's hard to notice. Perhaps my favorite thing is Crow's impersonation of Palance singing the Mary Tyler Moore Show theme song each time we see Palance driving a car.
Mike and the Bots had me laughing from start to finish on this one. Crow is especially biting in his comments, referring to the film as The T&A Team. When we watch a woman climb a ladder, he complains that the movie is giving away the plot, then he quickly gives in and announces his intention to just look at the breasts--that's really what this movie is about, when you get right down to it. The sexploitation factor here exceeds even the blaxploitation factor to be found in the script for Crow's new film project titled Chocolate Jones and the Temple of Funk.
Thrill to the intense drama of the protagonist searching frantically for the very important map she keeps in a safe place in her pocketbook; she's knows it's in there; oooh; it's very important; ooooooh; she knows she put it in there; oooooooh; there it is. Watch thrusting women kidnap, torture, and kill men without losing their happy-go-lucky demeanors or even breaking a nail. Watch manly men like Jack Palance stand around immobile so that a group of naturally endowed women can easily subdue them. Watch a school teacher share moments of torture treatment with one of her young students while another woman teaches the youngster how to shoot a gun. Yes, Angels Revenge is all of this and more. Oddly, I have to admit that I rather liked the movie itself; sure it's incredibly silly, shallow, degrading, and sometimes downright painful to watch, but at least the story keeps moving along at a good pace from start to finish, unlike many of the awful movies taken from the vaults of Deep Thirteen. This movie actually makes fun of itself; when you add in Mike, Tom, and Crow performing at the top of their game, you get 90 minutes of utter hilarity. You'll laugh; you'll cry; you'll ask why this awful movie was ever made--then you'll look up and remember 2, 4, 6, 8, 10, even 12 reasons..
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