Showing posts with label grindhouse. Show all posts
Showing posts with label grindhouse. Show all posts

5/30/2012

Sybil Danning's Adventure Theatre: Seven (1979) Review

Sybil Danning's Adventure Theatre: Seven (1979)
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B-movie veteran William Smith ("Invasion of the Bee Girls", "Grave of the Vampire") stars in this fast moving adventure as the leader of a small team of specialists assigned to break up a notorious Hawaiian crime syndicate.Amazonian action star Sybil Danning introduces the movie.Also starring Barbara Leigh, Art Metrano, Martin Kove, Susan Kiger, Guich Koock, and Richard Le Pore.Directed by Andy Sidaris ("Stacey!", "Malibu Express"). Great movie, must see advanture.

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4/02/2012

Madmen of Mandoras/The Devil's Hand (1956) Review

Madmen of Mandoras/The Devil's Hand (1956)
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"They Saved Hitler's Brain" is a cinematic travesty made over a decade or so by two different sets of people, starring two different sets of actors. What could possibly go wrong? The basis for the film is the very short 1963 feature "The Madmen of Mandoras", which was apparently shot years earlier and shelved for a while. In the late 1960s (1968 seems the most agreed upon date), some television brain trust wanted to broadcast "The Madmen of Mandoras", but it was too short to fit in a traditional movie time slot. They hired some film school students to shoot additional wraparound footage to boost the running time. The result is one of the most jarring viewing experiences in cinema history, and ranks up there with the very best of Ed Wood or Ray Dennis Steckler for enjoyable camp viewing.
The film opens with the newly shot footage of a smarmy male and a voluptuous female CID agent arguing and engaging in possibly the worst banter in film history. The acting and writing will both make you cringe; the good news is you frequently can't hear what's being said over the loud background music. It seems that the CID is investigating the death of a scientist who was working of the G-Gas project. The dead scientist knew of the antidote, and they discover that Dr. John Coleman, another brilliant scientist, has been kidnapped and taken to the South American country of Mandoras.
The G-Gas plot sort of devolves into a "Wild, Wild World of Batwoman" pursuit of evildoers, with the movie going on to feature crazy Nazis planning to take over the world, Hitler's head in a jar (who the cast refers to as "Mr. H") yelling orders in German, a brain dead kidnapping and murder subplot, lots of stock footage, a supremely annoying and pathetic romance subplot, ridiculously inept car chases, doublecrosses, gunplay, explosions, a fire, and Hitler's head melting. Everything is here but the kitchen sink, and that may be here too, just too grainy and out of focus to see.
For someone who adores nonsensical B-movies, "They Saved Hitler's Brain" is a film to marvel at, and I particularly recommend it as a double feature with "The Thing With Two Heads".

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Madmen of Mandoras (1963 74 mins.)Less than an hour after famed American neurobiologist John Coleman addresses a conference on the deadliest nerve gas ever developed he vanishes. Meanwhile on a small island called Mandoras in the Caribbean a group of fanatics from Nazi Germany have developed their own deadly nerve gas and intend to use it to take over the en of the world. The group carried out a secret experiment after WWII to give eternal life to the brain of Adolf Hitler. In the meantime the professor's daughter and his son-in-law in possession of a clue find their way to Mandoras. Can they find her father and stop these madmen before they take over the world? Now released under it's original film title this new edition has been mastered from the original negative and it has never looked so good!The Devil's Hand (1962 71 mins.)Rick Turner is haunted by strange dreams of a beautiful woman. When he and his fiancvisit a local doll shop he is surprised to encounter a doll that looks just like the woman that haunts him. He is also surprised to discover that not only does the owner of the shop have a doll that looks like his mystery woman but there is also a doll that looks just like his fianc . He soon finds himself involved with a satanic cult and the life of his fiancis slowly fading.System Requirements:Run Time:145 minsFormat: DVD MOVIE Genre:HORROR Rating:NR UPC:787364718894

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3/05/2012

Demons (Special Edition) (1986) Review

Demons (Special Edition) (1986)
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I rate this as one of the scariest and here's why. Years ago, when it was new and playing at the theater I saw it and let me tell you, seeing this film in a darkened theater is one terrifying experience. Perhaps because the demons were terrorizing the victims in a theater, I don't know, but it was beyond creepy and I still remember being scared out of mind to this day.

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DEMONS - DVD Movie

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2/21/2012

42nd Street Forever, Vol. 5: Alamo Drafthouse Cinema (2009) Review

42nd Street Forever, Vol. 5: Alamo Drafthouse Cinema (2009)
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4.6 stars
The first review here makes me realize how good we have it with the Alamo (actually Alamos; there's a bunch in town now). We've been watching random collections of clips just like this before most every showing of any movie since the original Alamo on 4th was crankin' in the 90s, and I've just always taken it for granted and assumed that every town has a rep theatre that does stuff like this.
I guess not! For that we can say thanks to the Alamo founders, Tim and Carrie League, and all the film freaks who put these things together. They done good, and continue to do it.
This collection really shows off the endless amount of cinematic cheese that has surfaced from the primoridal b-movie auteur muck and then disappeared over the decades. And believe it, there's lots more stuff like this in the Alamo vaults! I've seen some reeeeally obscure stuff in the previews, and with luck there'll be another Alamo dvd (or three) in this series.
Sex! Murder!! Mayhem!!! Coming soon to a drive-in near you...

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2/04/2012

The Starlite Drive-In Theater: Pom Pom Girls/The Van (1977) Review

The Starlite Drive-In Theater: Pom Pom Girls/The Van (1977)
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"The Pom-Pom Girls" can be summed up simply: Plenty of cute girls, not enough 'pom-poms', if you get my drift.
I could identify with 'The Van' a little better, since, growing up in the 70's, I clearly remember the van craze. It never caught on here on the east coast as much as it did in California, but I still recall lots of guys going full tilt into "van-o-mania".
If you're looking for 70's vintage T&A, you've got the wrong films with this 2-pack. There are only 3 scenes of nudity in "The Pom-Pom Girls" and they're very tame. The story line, although lame, gets us from begining to end, and that's about the best that can be said for it. It was quite interesting to see Robert Carradine, who later came into his own in "Revenge of the Nerds", in what had to be one of his very first roles.
"The Van" is a little better. At least the story is somewhat more believable, and the film's featured hottie, Connie Lisa Marie as 'Sally', gets a couple of nice extended scenes to show off her charms. First, while washing her car in a soaking wet tank top, then later when she hooks up with the movie's hero, a hapless red-headed dork named Bobby. That was one of the problems with "The Van"....the lead character Bobby, played by Stan Getz (aka Stuart Goetz), is a bit of a goofball and just not someone you could sympathize with or root for.

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12/14/2011

Riot on 42nd Street Review

Riot on 42nd Street
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Well it took long enough. After many problems and release date changes Riot on 42nd Street is finally available, but was it worth the wait?
The film centers around a Grindhouse type theater located on "the deuce," the theater's owner returns from a stint in prison after a run in with a drug pusher went wrong. After deciding to re-open the theater he ends up butting heads with a rival club owner. Eventually all hell breaks loose..
I'll be honest here, the film isn't that great. You've got Jeff Fahey playing a cop who pretty much just stands around doing nothing and the various gang members in the film seem more like Broadway dancers than violent criminals. To top it off the film moves at a snails pace.
Among all the bad there is some good. The movie offers an honest look at the 42nd St. of the 80's, smoke filled porn theaters, prostitution, strippers with no hope and saggy breasts, you get the idea. The location where the movie is shot really shines and if you're a fan of exploitation films you'll have a fun time reading some of the marquee signs. For fans of the red stuff there is plenty of it here including a few slow motion execution shots.
DVD Transfer: The transfer isn't going to blow you away or anything but this is probably the best this film has ever looked. Shriek Show and Code Red did a great job cleaning the print up.
DVD Audio: 2.1 track. Nothing too spectacular.
Extras: Not a whole lot here two "okay" featurettes and a really awesome selection of trailers, I counted about 23 total. The packaging is simple, no booklet or anything, but the cover art is great.
Overall the film just sort of falls flat. The sleazy scenery, blood, and squibs couldn't save it. The disc does have some nice extras, I absolutely loved the selection of trailers included. Even with the inclusion of awesome trailers I don't imagine I'll be revisiting this DVD any time soon. View at your own risk!

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11/20/2011

Starlite Drive-In Theater: Hustler Squad/Wild Riders (1976) Review

Starlite Drive-In Theater: Hustler Squad/Wild Riders (1976)
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I don't know about the movie Wild Riders because I wasn't interested, but here is my review on Hustler Squad:
The cover REALLY FOOLED ME!!! I feel like a sucker! I thought this movie was about five female soldiers that shoot up millions of ememies like in the movie Commando, Rambo 2 or The Losers. BUT NOOOO!!!! The girls didn't do ANYTHING!!! They just shot a couple of bad guys and left the rest of the enemies for the male soldiers! Of course, the action scenes were so-so, the graphics were blurred, and the story was stupid.
Another thing, the movie has only 3 action scenes: one at the begining, the second in the middle, and the third one at the end. The first and the third one were the longest but they were set at midnight, so you won't see the action so clear.
The only positive thing, is that the dvd has a cool intro with commercials, cartoons and movie previews before the movie starts. The rest is garbage.
Adios.


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11/16/2011

Scream Theater Double Feature, Vol. 2: The Last Slumber Party/Terror at Tenkiller (1988) Review

Scream Theater Double Feature, Vol. 2: The Last Slumber Party/Terror at Tenkiller (1988)
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The box says "2 classic slasher flicks." If by "classic" they mean "made in the 1980's" then this would be a true statement. By my estimation, the two movies featured here are two of the worst slasher movies ever made, and that's saying a lot about a genre that seemed to produce as many crappy films as it did good ones. Even at the low price, even the most dedicated horror fan will find these two difficult to sit through.
First up, we've got Terror at Tenkiller, released in 1986. A slasher movie that takes place in a lake/camping location.....hmmm how very original. It's shot on video, produced/directed/cowritten by Ken Meyer. The credits are filled with people with the last name Meyer, so this looks like a family affair. The two main characters are Leslie and her friend Jana: Leslie has a borderline-abusive boyfriend Josh who likes to push her around. At one point, Jana asks, "Do your parents know about the caveman stuff?" It's possible the film makers were trying to insert some kind of girl-power statements about leaving an abusive boyfriend, possibly because of the feminist backlash against slasher movies...it's pretty lamely done in any case. To unwind, the two girls take a vacation to an idyllic resort called Lake Tenkiller. "What a strange name for a lake!" remarks Leslie. Turns out the lake was named after an Indian princess who killed 10 members of a rival tribe, but of course it's also a sign of things to come.
This movie has the terrible acting that you'd expect from any of these ultra low-budget slashers, but what isn't expected is how boring the whole thing is. Once they get up to the lake, the story really drags, and it seems like half the time is spent with the girls on phone calls. It's revealed early on who the killer is, so that robs the story of any kind of suspense or surprises. There's two so-so gore scenes, a smattering of nudity, and at one point we see Leslie reading the Stephen King book "The Stand."
Next up, we have The Last Slumber Party, from 1988. This one is so unbelievably bad that it actually makes Terror at Tenkiller look decent; the picture quality alone gives it a shot-on-a-home video camera look. Obviously this was an attempt to cash in on the success of Slumber Party Massacre and its sequels. The story concerns a group of high school girls who decide to have a slumber party with all the expected ingredients: cheesy music, underage drinking, and sneaking in the boys who play practical jokes on them. Trouble is, there's an escaped mental patient on the loose with a scalpel, dressed in scrubs and a surgeon's mask. Linda, whose house is the location for the slumber party, just happens to be the daughter of the doctor who ordered the maniac's lobotomy, and he's a little ticked off about that.
There's some real hilarious moments here. The bad music, first of all, which ranges from shrieking cheese-metal (performed by Firstryke) to corny synth-funk, to exaggeratedly "scary" electronic themes. The acting is extremely deadpan, nearly porno-quality: a nurse character stutters one of her lines and it's left in the movie. There's cornball stereotypes like the jocks and a nerd character nicknamed "Science." There's moronic girl characters who say things like "munch out" when they want to eat snacks. All the ingredients for a 1980's funfest are here, but when you put them all together they add up to a boring film. There's no nudity, and no gore: just some fake blood that you can see squirting out of the scalpel when the maniac slashes throats. Considering the whole thing's only about 72 minutes long, it seems like a lot longer. People who like films that are painfully bad, below Mystery Science Theatre quality, may like it. I found it entertaining for a while but then it just became mind-numbing. Stephen Tyler is the writer and director, and also plays the maniac.
I would only recommend this DVD to diehard completists who want to own every slasher film ever made. With no special features, at least you can say you got two movies for a cheap price. Everyone else steer clear. If it's cheesy 80's slasher fun that you're craving, I'd say go with the far superior Slumber Party Massacre or Pieces. Other fun 80's horror films I would recommend would include Chopping Mall, Troll, The Gate, Killer Klowns from Outer Space, and the so-bad-it's good Night Train to Terror.

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9/07/2011

Starlite Drive-In Theater: A Dusk Til Dawn Marathon Review

Starlite Drive-In Theater: A Dusk Til Dawn Marathon
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Not a bad set to own if you like crappy movies in a weird sort of way (Like MST3K does). I found the movie "The Van" by far the best one of the lot, and "Van Nuys Blvd" to be second best. "Pom Pom Girls" would be good if they showed more "Pom Pom Girls" and less John Carradine. After those 3 though, most were very forgettable unless you want a nostalgic trip looking at old products and signs of the 50's, 60's & 70's. One nice surprise though were the cartoons and snack bar ads before the movie. Definitely was a plus. A bit of trivia, on "Hustler Squad", the one real dish of the movie (Anna) was a former Miss Finland in 1974 and runner up in Miss Universe. Watch the movie with the volume off unless you want to hear some really awful sound effects.

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8/28/2011

Starlite Drive-In Theater: Van Nuys Blvd./Little Laura & Big John Review

Starlite Drive-In Theater: Van Nuys Blvd./Little Laura and Big John
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Van Nuys Blvd is classic Crown International. The basic plot, Bobby gets bored with his life in a small town. Sure he's got a cute girlfriend and a mobile home. He wants more. He sees a news report about kids cruising Van Nuys Blvd. He gets in his van and heads out to LA for fun. He shows up at a drive in burger joint with his beat up van and still gets lucky with the ladies. It's amazing. And so plotless that it's like watching a documentary about SoCal culture in the 70s. I can't get enough of this film.
The same can't be said about Little Laura. it has a great cast and yet is very annoying. it wants to be an artsy version of Bonnie and Clyde. But the crimes are mostly against viewers. Such is the fate of a double feature. Get worked up watching Van Nuys and get it on with your date during Little Laura.

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